I am going through a lot of life changes at the moment. I’ve applied to education programs in both english and french, I’ve begun couple’s counselling after some great upsets, and now I’m home for reading week! As expected it snowed when I came home. I love the snow. In winter I feel like I belong perfectly in world. When all the snow is falling around me I think about how small I am. I came home Wednesday night and Thursday morning I found out my Grandpa’s second wife had died. When Zane talks about it he says matter-of-factly “It’s just so sad. Grandpa’s lost a second wife to cancer.” The funeral is Sunday.
But this is not supposed to be a sad grief filled post! I just thought “Hey! I haven’t said anything about the chaos that is my life.” So I thought I should spread some of it out. I’m also avoiding a class assignment to make a website. I hate it. Ugh. I like this blog better as a place to understand my artwork but… then I have posts like this so I guess it doesn’t really work. Too loose. Too scattered. I mention the counselling thing so the tattoo I got makes sense.
Last session our counsellor suggested making decisions together. Specifically, he asked that I try and consider which decisions of mine directly effect Boy Wonder. So then when I figured out when we’d be home I booked an appointment for a tattoo without telling him. I thought it would be a grand surprise! I had done this once before. With his name. Beautiful Edwardian script across my right rib cage. Both times I’ve ended up telling him on the off chance he’d hate it. And with the third tattoo (a small Green Lantern symbol as a wedding band) he just looked at me in exasperated confusion. “Didn’t we talk about this in counselling?!” hahahahaha. Yes. We did. Together decisions.He took me to the appointment and in less than an hour I had a new permanent marker of belief.
He seems to like it well enough. Nothing seems to convince him to get inked. I get tattoos that have at least 3 levels of meaning. This one is no different. 1 – It’s Green Lantern 2 – it’s a wedding band and 3 – is the togetherness of those elements together.
Green Lantern is a comic book hero I really admire. The best way to say it is that a Green Lantern is created when a ring seeks them out. It finds individuals with exceptional will power and serves to amplify their ability to great heights. This will driven ability is often confronted by the Yellow Lanterns of fear. I find that fantastically poetic. Will and fear in opposition but will incarnate/embodied wins. This embodiment is a huge part of my artwork also. So why a wedding band? I never wear my ring. Ever. I’ve begun pottery and have left or lost it in the studio too many times to continue risking it. That third level is embodiment of will within a marriage. The determinedness to stick to it and pursue a greater and deeper relationship with the person I’ve chosen to love.
I’m going to end this here because you can only put off work for so long. But hopefully in the coming days I can post more. Talk to you again soon!