Cry baby day

I’m a weepy mess for no apparent reason. (I deflect my feelings a lot. there are so many reasons. That’s why I’m here.)

  1. We are trying to buy a condo and move.
  2. Our lease is up June 30th
  3. The seller is trying to negotiate price with the possession date
  4. I have to apply for my cat to live in the condo
  5. She has to get fixed
  6. I made plans with Posie but I’m weepy because of the above
  7. I have near constant heart break lately

I had mentioned Boy Wonder (my hubby) and I are getting place together and I’m thrilled to paint it but as everything is going through there are hiccups. Like that they want asking price, aren’t willing to give us possession until the day our lease is up, and I find this petty and annoying. I really want to paint. I want the time and freedom to paint. Our real estate agent suggested we threaten to walk away but we really want this place. These feel like hard adult decisions that I don’t want to be making and it tempts me to bury myself in the love of people I shouldn’t (this is 7. the constant heart break)

valencia-1.jpg

This is Valencia. she is 5 years old and my emotional support companion. The idea of bringing her anyway to undergo surgery is deeply upsetting to me. What if somehow it break her and she is never the same cat again?!

She’s supposed to my emotional support. I can call her from across the house and she’ll come running to cuddle. She follows me through the house too. the idea of her being in pain is just awful….

 

As for Posie, we made plans. I have a lot to talk through with her. she is one of my closest ladies and I do want her support but I’m making plans and phone calls and signing documents and UUUUGH. I don’t have the courage to leave my house today. I just want to curl up and sit quietly.

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